Monday, August 06, 2007

2e3 ZANY CHEER '07



(Enter FARMER and FARMER’S WIFE. They are being lovey-dovey, holding hands with the FARMER’S WIFE giggling away. In the middle of the performing ground lies the donkey. They sit down.)


FARMER I’ve put the animals to sleep. You know what that means-


(The both of them laugh manically.)


(Behind them, gather the SHEEP who begin jumping over a fence. Slowly, the FARMER and the FARMER’S WIFE begin to fall asleep.)


(Seeing that the FARMER and the FARMER’S WIFE are falling asleep, the sheep slow down and act suspiciously. The mission impossible theme starts playing, and they all whip out sunglasses. They straighten themselves out and shift around stealthily until they form a single line and the music fades out.)


(From the middle of the line emerges the BLACK SHEEP, who is holding a giant egg.)


BLACK SHEEP The name’s baaaa. James baaaa.

[sheep, verse 1]

SHEEP
WEEEEEEEEEE~
Have the egg! (clap, clap)
We have the egg (clap, clap)
We have the E-G-G of TWO-EE-THREE!
We have the egg (clap, clap)
We have the E-G-G of TWO-EE-THREE’s-

- heart and soul
Is now off to be sold
If you can take us
We’re always ready to go

Cause we’re the sheep! (clap, clap)
Cause we’re the sheep! (clap, clap)
Cause we’re the S-H-EEP of TWO-EE-THREE!

(Just then, Kung Fu Fighting starts playing, and from the side emerges the CHICKENS. They are carrying weapons and swinging them around wildly, a stark contrast from the SHEEP. The SHEEP gather behind the BLACK SHEEP in fear.)


(The leader of the chickens emerges.)


LEADER OF CHICKENS I’m Captain James Clucky!


[chickens verse 1]

CHICKENS

*clucks*
We are the CHI-CKENS
Of TWO-EE-THREE
And we hope you know we’re just as ready to go
We want our E-GG back
Can’t you see
Cause it’s the H-E-ART of TWO-EE-THREE.

We’re gonna take it by force
Until you comply
We’re gonna rock you, gonna shock you
And make you wanna cry

Cause we’re CHI-CKENS
Cause we’re the CHI-CKENS
Cause we’re the CHI-CKENS of TWO-EE-THREE


(From behind the BLACK SHEEP, slowly emerge the SHEEP.)


[sheep verse 2]

SHEEP
You think we scared
Of what you say
Well we don’t care
So be on your way

The egg is ours
Does that make you sad?
Well you can’t have it
Cause we’re too BAAAAAAD.






[chickens verse 2]

CHICKENS
You had your chance (clap, clap)
Now we’re dominating
Well on our way to celebrating
Our victory (clap, clap)
That we can see
That TWO-EE-THREE’s gonna be free!

(Both groups prepare to charge at one another, when the donkey springs up with a loud bray.)


(A cheesy tune starts playing in the background.)


DONKEY
WAIT! Can’t you see? We’re all fighting for the same thing. And that’s love for two-ee-three! Our class, 36 of us, together, as one. We are a family. So stop it now, before someone gets hurt!


(Just then, one of the sheep sneeze violently, and crashes into the BLACK SHEEP, who lets the egg go flying right in front of the DONKEY. Everyone stares at the egg, before looking up slowly.)


(The DONKEY brays, the CHICKENS cluck, the SHEEP bleat and both groups charge towards each other and the DONKEY proceeds to hide. Hair is grabbed, tails are tugged, ears are pulled and everyone is shouting. The egg is untouched.)


(The FARMER and the FARMER’S WIFE are awoken by the commotion. They are shocked by what they see and proceed to stand up.)


FARMER’S WIFE What in the world is going on?


(With this, all animals freeze in their positions for a moment, then scramble off, with the SHEEP from where they entered and the CHICKENS from the opposing side.)


(The FARMER and the FARMER’S WIFE walk over to the egg and pick it up.)


FARMER SCRAMBLED EGGS!


(Both nod eagerly and walk off.)






- Kris.